…and a crush on a boy. I think it’s so funny that I am crushless. I like desire. I like not wanting anybody else, so that when I think about him, I’ll touch myself (I loved that song to the point of embarrassment). And yet…yeah. The singleness is normal to me. I’m mostly unaffected by it. But being without a crush? *Melodramatic back of hand to the forehead maneuver* I simply can’t bear it.
Okay, I can. But I don’t like it. Where are the dashing out of reach brothers? I find myself mired in a whole lot of pomposity, assholery, and generalized douche baggery. What does one do with that?
Where the brothers with easy smiles, kindly dispositions and pocket squares at? (My “in my mind” dude, in addition to being in the depths of South America hunting El Chupacabra, wears pocket squares.) What about a brother with a last name as a first name? Is that too much to ask? Jackson Washington, where art thou? Your decision to hide yourself is giving me stress acne. not even microdermabrasion has helped.
But I was just kidding. For a crush, I really can’t offer up my kingdom. Maybe we can settle on a stolen kiss, eh?