I’m not pro or anti resolution. I actually like the idea of adopting new habits for the new year and seeing how far I can run with them. Being so busy, sometimes I don’t figure out my resolutions until after the new year begins. I’m not sure that the following post falls under the domain of resolutions, or “new shit Imma try and see how that turns out for me, but since ten is a nice round number, I figured I’d go with it.
1. Laying off sugar. The only thing I hate more than looking fat is looking old. Sugar affects both weight and age, so I figured, two birds, one stone. I’m not giving it up, just easing off. This means cutting out sweets, since I also don’t rock with artificial sweeteners too tough. (Though that Coke Zero was acceptable when I needed a fix today.) This is sort of on the “must accomplish” list. Both of my chins would greatly appreciate it.
2. Budget. I’m the worst. When I see something, I have to do that. Like yesterday. Until Darren Sharper needs to get his delicious ass mind right, I’m the sole breadwinner, which leaves me with absolutely no margin for error when it comes to finances. I have to get a plan and stick to it.
3. Giving up Dat Bullshit. There are a whole lot of people on it, in vastly different ways. I’m really not interested in it. If you think this may apply to you, before you speak to me, email me, send me a message by carrier pigeon, facsimile transmission, or Morse Code, ask yourself, “Is this some ole bullshit?” If you have to think twice, it probably is. Keep it to yourself.
4. Drink more tea. It has antioxidants. Antioxidants are hella sexy. I yearn to be hella sexy. This basically sells itself.
5. Find Sexy Supportive Bras that Fit Perfectly. Being big, beautiful, and bodacious about the boob area makes it difficult to find something cute and functional. There’s that Jill Scott joint that people tried to convince me was a good idea, but no body contraption that does not require a prescription should have eight hooks. I want something normal, that fits, does not bruise me, and does not cut into my shoulders. That’s not too much to ask.
7. Figure out if this foot situation is the beginning of a bunion. My toe hasn’t been right since my birthday, and I’m trying to determine if this bump on the side of it is something insidious. I want to start wearin mah sexy shoes again.
8. Saying no to West Indian men. Fine ass Jamaican at Gallery Place, yes, this includes you. He was looking like all kind of business that I wanted to make some seriously questionable decisions with, and I wasn’t having it. I faked to the left and dashed to the other end of the platform. I have succumbed to the charm and ultimate frustration one time too many. Not sure I’m quitting yall forever, but we off dat for 2010. If you are of West Indian descent, and are wondering, “Damn, is it ME who has her thinking that way?” Prolly.
9. Date. I don’t mean search for a relationship. I don’t mean hook up. Before the internet, there was this thing called dating, and people would go to dinner, a place of interest to incite discussion and a meeting of minds, and possibly, if the fates smiled upon the two of you, repeat that activity at a later date. I’m not pressed for a relationship. It’s been long enough that I’m not exactly pressed for sex (not EXACTLY *snicker*). But I would like to hang out with interesting menfolk that can offer me more than a hard dick and bubble gum.
10. Write Write Write! I did ATTEMPT to get published in 2009; it just didn’t happen. I am continuing this for 2010. Of course, until then, self publishing via this delightful medium will have to do. I love my readers, and I love reading things you have written. I’m thankful for you. I have plans to make this place more interactive. Also, be on the lookout for more contributions to Naked Admonition. The Dialectic/Conflict Theorist are working to make the new spot a sounding board for the sexes, and help us understand one another just a little better.
A new decade people. LET’S GET IT!